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Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Worries

I was like ah have I gone blinde!  I slept in my contacts.

I couldn't get up and move around.  At 1st, it was more by choice.  I wanted eating with my mom.  It was so weird, my body was like I dunno wrapped in shells almost in the manner of a cocoon?  It was pieced together like still malleable drying iron machinery.  It was like cracky.  I was put together maybe like a computer.  I felt if I got up as though I would feel a funny feeling of discombobulation.

So, it was weird.  I was very upset.  My mom would not stop bugging me, and I used to not even wanna come out to see the doctor!  I felt almost forced to leave after throwing my laptop, which was breaking though it got better but then turned off.  I was bugged all through the group, made a joke of.  Someone made my nose too slick and I supposedly can get it back!  That guy behind me!  It feels Ellen is just telling them right and left to hurt me in some way each time.  I know I was so good the 1st time at a group.  These groups are not as good as I imagine.  What else?  I was bothered other ways.  I'm also made to feel I deserve nothing but hurt coming up.  So.

Also, I was looking up and out, it was so weird.  My eyes and my body.  In there I also scuffed a bump in my boots.  I had to scrench things rather than hit things and say a word I didn't like more than once.